Where there's (no) smoke (detector), there's (no) fire.

Laying on my couch one evening shortly after settling into my new apartment here in Berlin, I was staring at the walls in my usual manner thinking about something random when it occured to me, "I should figure out where the smoke detectors are in my place." So, I took a look around, head pointed up to the the cieiling and walked the whole apartment. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero.

At first, I thought maybe it was some sort of super modern euro smoke detector that I wasn't seeing? Perhaps some sort of bathroom fan / ceiling light type of contraption that would also altert me in case my apartment was on fine. After getting on a chair to fully inspect the lights and the bathroom fan, I realized that it was really true that I didn't have a smoke detector in my apartment. Flabbergasted, I decided to not look too much into it and kind of shove it out of my head so I didn't freak out.

The apartment is fully renovated, "saniert", as they call it in Germany, and given my super sleek flat top stove with no oven* in the apartment - surely I am not actually at a fire risk. But still...it doesn't sit right. After being drilled for years from kindergarden up on the importance of "fire safety" and "fresh batteries" I can't help but get a little sweaty at the thought of no fire prevention in my apartment.

A couple of days later I encounter the manager (denoted as M) of the building in the lobby...the conversation went as follows:

C: Nice smile, "Quick question, wondering why I don't have any smoke detectors in my apartment?"

M: Puzzled look, "Why do you need a smoke detector? Are you setting things on fire?"

C: Wierd look, "No, but um, I just don't understand why I don't have one. It's kind of unsafe."

M: Look of surprise, "Unsafe? Why? Most apartments don't have fire detectors, only in public building and in hallways. Plus, your apartment is renovated."

C: Distressed, "Look, I'm not setting things of fire, but it just seems so strange. What if there is a fire?"

M: Look of assurance, "Oh, there won't be any fires here."

And with that...he stepped off the elevator.

And ladies and gentlemen, I am still pondering the meaning of the no smoke detector. I think though, that it goes back to some cultural differences? Where things in Germany are referred to as "possible" or "impossible", very rarely will you find; "Maybe", "I don't know" or "I'm not sure". If there is the vague chance that they are unclear - you're lucky if they lie to you instead of just totally not answering or the all too familar "Huff" and head turn.

Of course, this is a vast generalization. I really like living here for the most part, but it's fun to share these little "incidences" where I'm thrown out of my little German Comfort Bubble where I think I know everything about where I'm living.

*It was either an oven or a super huge balcony. Easy.

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